Premier League

Darwin Nunez and four other new signings that will be great for sh*ts and giggles

Nottingham Forest players celebrate their goal against West Ham

Is it too early to declare Darwin Nunez the greatest Premier League signing of all time? Absolutely not. A ludicrous flicked goal, a fluked assist and a ridiculous red card within his first two games is the stuff of greatness. 

That his obviously deserved red card has prompted some really weird defences from Liverpool-adjacent pundits only adds to the sense of a master at work. But luckily for us, he’s not the only chaotic footballer to make a move this summer.

 

Darwin Nunez
Yes please. This is precisely the way we want the £85m superstar arrivals in Our League to behave. Total, utter chaos with heroism and villainy never more than a moment away. Darwin’s start to Premier League life has been absolutely spot on. A Community Shield performance to Serve Notice of what he was about, a Premier League debut that really, in its own beautifully ridiculously chaotically impressive way, asked more questions than it answered and then a home debut that few will forget.

Against Fulham, there is absolutely no doubt that Darwin altered the course of the game. Yet the manner in which he did so was… weird. The flick for his goal managed to be both brilliantly inventive and also unconvincing – and also came almost immediately after a failed attempt, which was enjoyable – while his assist came from a dismal miscontrol in the penalty area. Incredibly that has already been usurped as the best assist for Liverpool this season thanks to James Milner putting the equaliser against Palace on a plate for Luis Diaz. Nunez, of course, had departed stage right by this point having walked into Joachim Andersen. Clumsy dafty.

 

Richarlison
Spurs’ summer spending has been unreasonably impressive, with eye-catching names who provide obvious squad and/or starting XI improvement secured all over the shop. The age profile is also ideal, ranging from the wily veteran Ivan Perisic to the promising if raw Djed Spence and plenty filling the acres of space between the two.

We pretty much had to include one of them here, and we’ve gone for Richarlison. You want reasons? Sigh. Fine, we’ll give you reasons. First, he’s a fascinating bit of business from Spurs because on the one hand paying north of £50m for a player with a good but not great Premier League record who has almost no shot at being first choice seems a bit mad. But he’s also an immediate second choice in three different positions, and what makes him most tantalising is he possesses enough of the cunning and…

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