Kylian Mbappe leads the 2022 top goalscorers list but Erling Haaland is now only a handful of goals behind the want-away Frenchman.
The criteria: All club goals in all competitions for clubs in top five leagues. Sorry Amahl Pellegrino.
10) Neymar – PSG (21 goals)
No goals in October and now being cited as the reason Kylian Mbappe wants out of PSG. The rest of 2022 went rather better for the Brazilian.
9) Sadio Mane – Liverpool/Bayern Munich (22 goals)
That Mo Salah hat-trick v Rangers has at least taken him above Jarrod Bowen for goals scored in 2022, but the suspicion persists that Liverpool sold the wrong man. Mane has hardly flown in Munich but nor has he flopped. He is decent.
8) Ciro Immobile – Lazio (22 goals)
At 32, he just keeps on keeping on. Six goals in nine Serie A games this season is excellent work from a striker who has hit 20 Serie A goals in five of his six full seasons with Lazio. That has got to be one the best £8.5m spends of all time.
7) Harry Kane – Tottenham (25 goals)
He has passed his 2021 total by mid-October, which is phenomenal work from a striker who must be absolutely seething that Erling Haaland has come and basically given him no chance of winning the Golden Boot.
He is the original cheat code, though.
6) Wissam Ben Yedder – Monaco (25 goals)
Not even in the latest France squad after his goals dried up early this season, but he has since responded with a hat-trick v Nantes and a couple of goals v Trabzonspor in the Europa League to give Didier Deschamps some (lovely French) food for thought.
5) Karim Benzema – Real Madrid (27 goals)
Failing to score in two games against Shakhtar is sub-optimal but is currently absolutely f***ing nailed on for the Ballon dOr so probably cares little.
4) Christopher Nkunku – RB Leipzig (30 goals)
A target for Real Madrid as the long-term successor to Karim Benzema, he is second in the Bundesliga top scorer charts this season. And still can’t get a France start because they have Oliver Giroud.
3) Erling Haaland – Borussia Dortmund/Manchester City (30 goals)
Has played comfortably the least amount of football of anyone on this list but has already scored a frankly ludicrous 20 goals for Manchester City. You can read more of his ridiculous statistics here. A goal every 71 minutes, folks.
2) Robert Lewandowski – Bayern/Barcelona (34 goals)
Just the 14 goals for Barcelona so far, which seems absolutely reasonable. He was the top scorer in 2021 and will be…
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