Watch the Bruno Fernandes ‘almighty wobbler’ as Lisandro Martinez schools Salah

If you think that is an ‘almighty wobbler’ then you have never seen a toddler as the Bruno Fernandes untruth takes hold. Plus, Lisandro Martinez escapes criticism.

Keeping things in perspective
Maybe he was smarting after being made to look foolish over his Manchester United Quadruple talk, but James Ducker of the Daily Telegraph has really taken United’s humiliation to heart. And his primary target is Bruno Fernandes, who committed the ultimate crime of not being very happy about losing 7-0 and behaving somewhat petulantly, as he has done so many times before.

But do you know what Fernandes did not do? There are two clues in the headline on the Telegraph site:

‘Bruno Fernandes’ tantrum bordered on insubordination’

All good. Except he did not a) throw a tantrum or b) refuse to follow instructions.

Here is how Ducker begins his piece:

‘As Mohamed Salah wheeled away in delight and Liverpool toasted their sixth goal, with the final, humiliating blow still to be delivered by the right boot of Roberto Firmino, the board went up to signal the end of Marcus Rashford’s afternoon. Cue an almighty wobbler in the centre circle from Manchester United’s second half super brat, Bruno Fernandes, who threw up his arms in disgust as if to ask why it was not him who was coming off.

‘United have denied this was the case and insisted the Portugal midfielder had actually been seeking clarity from the bench about his position.’

And this, ladies and gentlemen, is the ‘almighty wobbler’:

Neville : “Bruno Fernandes asking to come off “ Always twisting things pic.twitter.com/7NufkaKQ5o

— Charel (@charel2003) March 6, 2023

Presumably Ducker does not have a toddler and has never had a toddler, if he thinks that is an ‘almighty wobbler’.

‘But football audiences are no strangers to the sight of Fernandes’ histrionics and his petulance seemed to take on ever darker shades as United’s Anfield meltdown deepened.’

‘Ever darker’? The man threw his hands up in the air a few times. As he has done many times before. He is a bit of a d**k but those asterisks are not hiding the word ‘dark’?

‘When Ten Hag comes to watch it all back, few things may disappoint United’s manager quite like Fernandes’ wretched behaviour. As someone who places such a premium on high standards and discipline, it simply cannot go unaddressed.’

Wretched? If Ducker was guilty of hyperbole last week (he was) then he has doubled down this week. Because of…