It’s the event that’s got the nation talking, bigger than Partygate or the impending return of Love Island. Yes, it’s the libel trial between Coleen Rooney and Rebekah Vardy or, more specifically, the wonderful court drawings they’ve inspired.
Christened the ‘Wagatha Christie’ trial by tabloid headline writers, the fall-out between the wives of two Premier League goalscoring legends has warmed hearts across the British Isles – it’s certainly cheaper than heating the house these days.
With the case yet to reach a verdict, Planet Football isn’t about to offer our opinions on the trial or the relative merits of social media. But we’re going to do the next best thing and rank all the court sketches of Wayne Rooney from worst to best.
(Disclaimer: they’re all terrible and brilliant in equal measure).
9.
The Derby County manager doesn’t have time for this bullshit, as the death stare in the direction of Mrs Vardy demonstrates.
Also, despite stiff competition from Shay Given and Brendan Gleeson, Rooney has the most ‘Irish head’ in the history of mankind. Which, if you think about it, is a bigger honour than the League Cup.
Genuinely feel sorry for Wayne Rooney. Having to sit there all day in court listening to nonsense that has nothing to do with him and when he hasn’t done anything wrong, and some joker keeps drawing him like this. pic.twitter.com/BLAfAYe56X
— Oscillating Wildly (@OscillateWWFC) May 12, 2022
8.
The ‘Yassification’ of a Manchester United legend – and we’re all for it.
what on earth did Wayne Rooney do to the court sketch artist to deserve this pic.twitter.com/sQBGbJzDEC
— Alice Lia Maro (@slimelia) May 17, 2022
7.
While Rooney is drawn as a 1920s Toby Jug, it’s Rebekah’s husband that steals the scene here.
Who knew she ditched Jamie for Robert Huth?
I’m pretty bad at drawing but based on this sketch from the Rooney/Vardy trial I’m going to become a courtroom artist because it seems anyone can do…
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