Dizziness-inducing, channel-hopping Group C climax leaves Argentina’s recovery a mere footnote

Mexico’s long run of last-16 World Cup exits came to an end on an odd night of bizarre excitement as Group C came to a head.

Well that was fun, wasn’t it?

It’s saying something – and much of it not particularly complimentary about Poland’s performance – that Argentina putting their dramatic matchday one wobble emphatically behind them to top the group was quickly reduced to a footnote in a deliriously thrilling and often bizarre Group C denouement.

We concede that “flicking between two games in the final minutes to see if there’s been any yellow cards” wasn’t something we particularly considered when bemoaning the watered-down group format that awaits us at the next World Cup but add it to the list now. This wasn’t always, or even that often, about great football but it was delirious entertainment. That this level of intrigue and excitement was all for nothing more significant than discovering whether it would be Poland or Mexico who earned the right to be swept aside by France in the last 16 only makes it better.

But we’re getting ahead of ourselves. Let’s go back a bit and remind ourselves how we got here. There must be words of praise here for Saudi Arabia, who ended up bottom of Group C but did so, so much to make it the most compelling group of the lot even if the final analysis – Argentina top with not much between Poland and Mexico for second – was eminently predictable.

The Saudis’ absurd win over Argentina smashed the group wide open, but in the end their role in the even more absurd conclusion was as disruptor rather than primary combatant. At 2-0 down to a previously sleepy but suddenly very awake and gloriously alive Mexico, their own race was run. But they still had a role to play. Across Qatar, Argentina were 2-0 up against a near-comatose Poland. At that point there was nothing whatsoever to separate Mexico and Poland in second place behind Argentina. Both had four points. Both had a level goal difference. Both had scored two goals. Poland were going through because they had received fewer yellow cards than the Mexicans. Think of that.

We were approaching a point where a match report with the headline “Last-gasp Poland yellow card sends Mexico through to last 16” was tantalisingly possible and I think we can all agree that would have been tremendous.

Apparently fully aware of the bizarre yet very real situation unfolding, Poland’s approach to the last 30 or so minutes of their game was grimly…