Man City and Haaland have reduced Our League to record-smashing Numberwang. Boring? We love it

Manchester City and Erling Haaland are breaking Our League. We should be appalled, but we’re absolutely loving every absurd minute of it.

The worst thing that can happen to any league, we’re always told, is for it to become uncompetitive. For one team to acquire such utter dominance that everyone else is beaten before the season even begins. That the destination of the title is a foregone conclusion.

We know this because we’ve even said it ourselves. We’ve all had a good chuckle, haven’t we, about the Scottish League or the German League or the French League where there’s really only one team or sometimes if you’re lucky two who can possibly win the league?

How drab. How boring. Could never be Our League. Not with all its great teams and rivalries and the ferocious intensity of its competition.

So obviously we must be absolutely furious about Manchester City, already comfortably the best team in the Premier League, being handed a great big absurd Norwegian cheat code to ruin the competitive edge of Our League beyond breaking point.

Especially when you combine that with the collapse of Liverpool. That was always going to happen at some point too; you can only defy gravity for so long and Jurgen Klopp and his team had done so on an absurd basis for five years in which absolutely nobody else could even be bothered to try and compete with Pep Guardiola’s side. When you have to constantly sprint just to stand still you are eventually going to burn out.

But here’s the thing. We’re not at all bored by City’s absurd excellence. We’re utterly fascinated and enthralled by it. Even those of us who were in the, ahem, ‘obviously he’s brilliant but will he really make that much difference?’ camp are now long past the cringing embarrassment at our own epic wrongness and just thoroughly enjoying the ride.

Forget everything we’ve ever said about City’s finances, or about how competitiveness is the cornerstone of any enjoyable league. We are absolutely loving the ludicrous results of this insane experiment where we found out precisely what happens when the best team in the league is then given the most astonishing young footballer on earth as well.

Now we’re pretty confident we’re not going to get remotely bored with watching the big blond nonsense score goal after goal after goal for at least a couple of years. Really, the only thing that could bore us, certainly for this season, would be if Haaland becomes vaguely mortal and…