Spurs fans are the happiest in the Premier League and we’re just going to have to grit our teeth and wait for the inevitable crash.
Quite a bit has changed since we last did this in April.
Norwich, Watford and Burnley sadly drop off the list to be replaced by three shiny new teams. Liverpool drop quite a bit. We still don’t really know where to put Chelsea. But top spot and bottom spot remain the same, strangely. Arsenal were also quite low back then as well which shows just how late their run to ‘almost certain Champions League qualification’ and then ‘bollocksing up almost certain Champions League qualification’ came.
Anyway, April’s instalment is here. Now read on…
1) Tottenham (1)
Nauseatingly chipper. There was a mail after the Champions League final that wondered despairingly if Spurs fans didn’t actually end the season as the only truly happy fans among the Big Six. As you can see, we have been forced to confirm those suspicions. Pinching a Champions League spot was quite something – it’s a tournament we really didn’t think Spurs were going to bother with again – but doing it at Arsenal’s expense in that manner was truly sweet with the ensuing meltdown from Arsenal fans obviously only adding to the vibes.
More ludicrously still, it actually looks like Spurs are going to use the opportunity to actually do something. They made a genuinely eye-catching signing before the end of May and have been given £150m in free money from owners ENIC to spaff away on shiny new players. Obviously this is Tottenham, so everyone else just needs to hold tight, get through this, and wait for inevitable falseness of this dawn to kick in, but for now these are sunny skies indeed over N17.
2) Newcastle (5)
Finished the season in Champions League form and are richer than God. While everyone else looks on asking serious questions about sportswashing or wondering whether Eddie Howe can take this rare chance for a manager from outside the…
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